Homesick?

Reasons I’m terrified of going home:
This list is a mix of entertaining observations of cultural differences and things that I am seriously not looking forward to losing when I leave.
1. I’ll hiss at restaurant waiters
2. After I hiss at them, I’ll forget to tip because it’s not necessary to tip in Ghana.
3. I’ll starve whenever I take a bus and there are no vendors crowding by the windows at every stop
4. I’ll freeze. America is cold.
5. I’ll give new neighbors live chickens and yams instead of baking bread or cookies
6. I’ll cuss because I won’t be able to find guinea fowls for the new neighbors instead of chickens
7. I’ll bow down to greet anyone older than me
8. I won’t wake up to the Muslim call to prayer
9. I won’t be able to sleep without hearing all the bats in my ceiling
10. I might get arrested for peeing on the side of the road
11. I’ll think something is wrong when children no longer follow me in throngs.
12. I’ll be sued for harassment when I try to make small children cry (sometimes children here cry when they see a white person. This was disconcerting at first, but the parents think it’s hilarious, so now if it looks like the kids are uncomfortable, I’ll move closer to the delight of the parents.)
13. I’ll start saying things like “nice shirt. Give it to me now!”
14. I’ll still think that it’s perfectly reasonable to fit 3 adults, 2 small children, a goat and a sack of groceries on a motorcycle.
15. Any time I can’t find someone I’ll say that they are unstable
16. I’ll try to compliment people by telling them that they are growing fat
17. I’ll think hitchhiking is a perfectly normal, reasonable, and safe way to get around
18. When I want groceries, I’ll give a seven year old some money and a motorcycle to go pick them up for me.
19. If I buy my own groceries, I’ll have to get them from a store. Market is so much more fun- it’s an excuse to visit all your friends who are selling things. I also tend to get a lot more food for free at my market than I ever have in a grocery store. Then again, I find myself buying stuff I don’t really need when I go to market. I never did that in America.
20. I won’t get to greet as many people. I really look forward to talking to a lot of people every day. People in America aren’t outside as much, and they expect you to have plans with them before you come over. In Ghana, you can just show up and be welcomed.
21. I won’t be able to sleep outside every night.
22. I speak English well, so people won’t laugh at everything I say anymore.
23. I’ll actually know what people are saying about me.
24. People will look at me funny when I carry things on my head.
25. No tezed or fufu or ochra stew or groundnut stew or bofrut. I might starve when I go back.
26. I might not get to take afternoon naps any more.
27. When I hear gunshots at 4 a.m., I’ll think it’s a good idea to go and greet the house that they’re coming from.
28. Every single person that I walk by won’t be asking me where I’m going. This sounds like something that would be nice about going home, but when you have a really poor sense of direction like me, it’s nice when people ask and all direct you where you need to go.

Homesick
The top things I’m homesick for (not counting obvious things like my family and friends):
1. Friendly dogs. People in Ghana treat animals differently than people in America treat them. The result is that you almost never see a friendly dog- when you see dogs and other animals, they keep their distance.
2. Food- sort of. I really like the food here, and I think whenever I go back to America I’ll miss Ghanaian food as much or more than I miss American food here. I do miss yogurt, butter, real bread (I’m too much of a bread snob for the stuff they have here to count as real bread) spinach, and berries of all kinds. I can get a decent hamburger in the city, and my awesome friends keep me stocked up on pretty much anything I crave that can be shipped. Thanks!
3. Public libraries. There are libraries here, but it’s not even close to an American library. America in general and Salt Lake in particular rock at public libraries.
4. Taking the bus to work. I had a great routine before I left where I would walk to the bus stop and talk to a construction crew flagger while I was waiting for my bus. I always sat near the driver, Patty, and another passenger who had the same schedule as me and would talk to them until I got to my stop. Then I would talk to the crosswalk guard at the school near my old work, and he would always be laughing and playing with the kids. I really miss that whole routine.
5. Housecleaning. I hated cleaning my house in America, but I really hate it here. It’s a lot more work, I have to do it more often, and I’m a lot more likely to run into some sort of scary looking insect.
6. Garbage bins. There aren’t many garbage bins here. If you are travelling, it’s almost impossible not to litter. I don’t approve of littering, so this is hard for me.
7. Bike shops. I miss being able to bring my bike to a shop, have them fix the problem, and tell me if anything else is wrong with my bike. Here, they will tell you what part you need. Then you have to find and buy the part, bring it back to the repairman, and wait for them to fix it. They don’t check to see if there are any other problems with the bike. This is extra frustrating with my language barrier.
8. Silverware and eating at a table. Every time I eat with my hands I end up burning my fingers. I also really like eating with everyone at the table. Women all eat together here, but usually men and guests (like me) are served in a separate bowl in a separate room. I am close enough with a few families that I can eat with the women now, which is nice.
9. Diapers. I hate it when new moms hand me their kids and all I can think of is if the baby is going to pee on me. The answer has been yes enough times for me to be worried.